mixed messages
10.22.02 @ 2:25 p.m.
I was feeling nicely self confident a moment ago because a guy working at Common Grounds took the time to chat with me while I was waiting for my food. Some of the wind was taken out of my sails when I remembered that the first thing he said to me was, "Gee, you look tired."
Great.
It's true, though. I am bloody tired. I slept for two hours after Italian and felt too out of it for yoga, so I skipped it and spent an hour plunking at my guitar. I think I'd be happiest going back to sleep. Failing that, back to my guitar. But that is not to be, alas alas, because I have a two page paper due tomorrow afternoon. Two pages? Pshaw. Nothing to it. But that doesn't mean I want to do it. Not by any means. I meant to be working on it a long time ago, but I didn't even realize that I had to do it until last night when I looked at my calendar and saw "H paper due" on today's date. I swore a bit. I took a look at the source material I'm supposed to analyze. I went back to fanfic at the Derbyshire Writers Guild. Shame shame shame on me. Oooh, crikey. I might have a midterm tomorrow in Journalism, too, which means reading about a hundred chapters of my J book. GAAAAH! WHY do I get myself into these situations!?! I hate myself! I mean it, I am well and truly fucked right now. *sniffles* I want to climb back into my bed and make the whole big bad world go away.
At least I can be sort of happy that I've worked out the plot synopsis for Emma. I think I'm going to change the names on that and then it'll just be a story in the style of Jane Austen and not a fanfic at all. I'm only very loosely playing with established characters, anyway. Nez in this story is a lot more uncertain, less bold and eccentric than real (or even TV) Nez, so he could really be anyone. It's more of a Mr. Darcy with musical inclinations anyway, so why bother treating it like a fanfic? It hardly applies. I mean, for the most part, I just couldn't be bothered to come up with original names. I'm thinking I should not be throwing unmarried peoples into social situations so much as I do, but it's so much easier to have everyone an orphan--Jane conveniently killed off the elder Bingleys and Darcys. I don't think the Lennons would easily vist, unless I rewrite the beginning and marry off Lennon. Maybe Mr. Lennon could marry Miss Starkey and that way Mr. Starkey would be travelling with his sister and her husband and that way everyone could convene at Doland Park with a certain amount of 'adult supervison.' You see, I'm anticpating marrying off Miss Lennon to George Doland. This is completely nonsensical, isn't it? Well, if I rewrite the thing and change the names, I guess I'll post it in it's entirity. How's that? It's quite nice, writing is. I like planning and writing and coming up with plots and intrigues. Ha, I ought to give Rachel the URL of this diary so at least one person knows what I'm blathering on about. Apart from me, that is.
I also want to add that I'd kill for some acrylic paint... and something to use them on. Damn obligations and tiny living spaces!
Previously
fuck it @ 08.01.05
fanciful imaginary sea voyages to come @ 07.20.05
*dies* @ 07.19.05
more ootp @ 07.17.05
harry potter: driving our children into devil worship @ 07.17.05
