oh the drama of it all
10.26.02 @ 12:20 p.m.
Ha, I promise not to write about my story today. I swear. Except for that little bit where I promise not to talk about it.
I'm going to make a sweeping generalization, and if I offend someone, well, I'm not going to apologize for working from my own experiences. There are exceptions to every rule. Saying that, there are two kinds of girls who obsess over anime. There are loud, brash girls who vacillitate between noisy 'fuck yeah!' and squealy 'oh aren't you cute can I pet your hair?' Then there are tiny, stick thin girls who study Japanese and are either deathly quiet and shy or loud like the other girls. I swear, Nora, Jeannie, Paige, Moni, and Jessi are all mutations of the same person. They're variations on those two themes and while hanging out with one anime person can be tolerable or even cool, I cannot stand to be around two when they are together. This probably makes me some kind of huge hypocrite because I have my own archaic obsessions. I try not to push them too hard on people or talk about them exclusively when others are around but I'm probably just as annoying to my parents about the Monkees as these girls are ocassionally to me. That's why I'm very tolerant and patient in my actions and I let loose some horrible stereotype when I write. If I keep it all inside me I'll start hating these people. I admit I never really thought of Jessi as a really good friend. I was one of the few people she didn't scare in Junior High. I can really get a long with Paige, but I can see why Amy and Andrew are starting to get frustrated. I think perhaps Moni and I are in a delicate balance here--I'll be tolerant of whatever anime and food network stuff she wants to go on about so long as she never attacks the Monkees again. That was painful and it's why I won't attack something someone dearly loves to their face. I'll tell someone when I'm just not interested, but I never want to disparage something someone really, truly loves. I know it's possible to love a concept very much, and geeky as it looks to outsiders, I think it's good to be able to embrace a concept, a thing, if it can make you happy. I think my loving the Monkees is a reflection of the depth to which music can effect me and the love I have for comedy. I like the show because it's hilarious and clever, and the music isn't bad. I don't expect everone to love it but I think it's better than most people think it is. One of the reasons I like to go on Rockaholics Anonymous is to try and break that "Oh, crap pop Daydream Believer they didn't play their own instruments" prejudice. I blew somebody away with Michigan Blackhawk and I am immensely proud that I could expose something I love to others.
Whew. That was a lot of emotional outpouring, actually. And it started out kind of mean, didn't it? I don't like being in situations where I don't understand what's being discussed, and worse, I don't care. I guess this makes me understand Moni's frustration with me always talking about the Monkees to Martha. But Moni had all sorts of time to spend with Martha. I only had that lunch period that year and she was the only other person I could talk to. I do not regret that.
GAAH! What is it with me and making myself do things that will make me cry lately? I read a horribly, horribly tragic P&P fic and I cried like crazy last night. It had Jane dying at Netherfield from her cold and Elizabeth being cast out of her family because Mrs. Bennet blamed her for not taking good enough care of Jane. Lots of sad, sad remembering and a lot of Darcy being there for Lizzy. Oooh! Shame on me! I almost started talking about my story. Well, I shan't. I'm going to try not to work on it today or too much until November.
I'm so hungry, I think I'll raid our tiny, tiny, (didn't need to be that tiny but it's E*'s so I won't complain too much) fridge. Then I think I need to drag myself out of this room to go read Othello for a while. I should also take a stab at fixing the brakes on my bike. Maybe I'll go to the mall or to go see Igby Goes Down at the Bijou. At least I got some social interaction last night. I'm unhappy with how little I do. Slavik, the bastard, managed to make me feel really inadequate with all his skills and talents.
Previously
fuck it @ 08.01.05
fanciful imaginary sea voyages to come @ 07.20.05
*dies* @ 07.19.05
more ootp @ 07.17.05
harry potter: driving our children into devil worship @ 07.17.05
